FEAR
False Evidence Appearing Real
Yesterday, after I wrote my post, I thought about a question I used to ask myself when I suffered from obsessive worry and severe panic attacks," If I keep praying and trusting God to heal me and help me cope with all this fear in my life, why am I still suffering?" I wondered what I was doing wrong, and I would beat myself up for not having enough faith. Perhaps you are feeling that way right now. Maybe you feel like your prays to alleviate anxiety don't seem to be working. Prayer always works; however, sometimes, it comes in unexpected ways. Here is an answer to one of my prayers regarding worry and anxiety...
I suffered from panic attacks off and on for the better part of eighteen years, and after many many different therapists, God put into my life, Julie! Julie has been my therapist for the past thirteen years, and I have learned so much from her. She has helped me shine a light on my fears, and then, more importantly, what to do once they are exposed to the light.
I want to share with you a technique I learned during therapy (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT*)
Divide a sheet of paper into five columns labeled fear/worry, worst-case scenario, cognitive distortion, evidence to the contrary, and reframing. You can also use an app that mimics this approach**
Identify the fear and write it down in the first column.
Ask the question, "What's the worst-case scenario?" (I know what your thinking, we are in it right now, but bear with me). Write down your answer in column number two.
Identify what type of thinking is occurring when you worry about this particular fear. In CBT, the following are the types of cognitive distortions:
Mind Reading: Thinking that others are reacting to you negatively.
Personalizing and Blame: You feel as if you are to blame or you blame others unnecessarily.
Fortune Telling: Predicting that bad things are going to happen.
All or Nothing Thinking: Outcomes and situations are black and white only.
Catastrophizing: Believing that a situation will be so terrible, you will not be able to handle it.
Labeling: You personally identify with your shortcomings, giving no room for mistakes.
Overgeneralizing: You see a negative situation as never-ending patterns of failure.
Negative Filtering/Discounting Positives: Concentrating on negatives while seeing positives as insignificant.
Magnification or Minimization: You either blow things out of proportion or inappropriately shrink their importance.
Should Statements: You criticize yourself or others with "should" statements.
Provide evidence to the contrary. For this step, investigate and research the chances of your worst-case scenario occurring. For example, when I first started therapy, I could not fly. As part of my homework, I look up the statistics of getting in a plane crash.
Finally, put it all together by reframing your fear.
Let me go back to my example of flying:
I am afraid to fly
I will get in a plane crash
Fortune Telling
Statistics of getting in a plane crash 1 in 5 million
"I recognize that I am afraid to fly because I think I will get into a plane crash. However, this is fortune telling, and the chances of actually getting a plane crash are statistically very low.
This approach may seem very simplistic, and when I started, I wondered how it could help. The key is to follow these steps every time you feel yourself beginning to worry. For me, this approach broke the cycle of my worry, and I started to see patterns in the type of cognitive distortions I was using most.
**I am kind of app crazy and can usually find an app for anything! An excellent app to use for this technique is CBT Thought Diary . There are also many different mental health apps and a great resource to find them is from the Anxiety and Depression Association of America